Onlywhenhe’sdrunk!

Adriverisstoppedbyapoliceofficer.Thedriverasks,"What’stheproblemofficer?"Officer:"Youweregoingatleast75ina55zone."Man:"Nosir,Iwasgoing65."Wife:"Oh,Harry.Youweregoing80."(Themangiveshiswifeadirtylook.)Officer:"I’malsogoingtogiveyouaticketforyourbrokentaillight."Man:"Brokentaillight?Ididn’tknowaboutabrokentaillight!"Wife:"OhHarry,you’veknownaboutthattaillightforweeks."(Themangiveshiswifeanotherdirtylook.)Officer:"I’malsogoingtogiveyouacitationfornotwearingyourseatbelt."Man:"OhIjusttookitoffwhenyouwerewalkinguptothecar."Wife:"OhHarry,youneverwearyourseatbelt."Themanturnstohiswifeandyells,"SHUTYOURMOUTH!"TheOfficerturnstothewomanandasks,"Ma’am,doesyourhusbandtalktoyouthiswayallthetime?"Thewifesays,"No,onlywhenhe’sdrunk."